MORBID on indefinite hiatus (obviously lol)
obviously lol. A temporary sign-off with a special offer for paid subscribers.
Hi, everyone. It’s me, Tara. The one who went out for smokes last spring, and basically never came back.
When I started writing this, I had relatively few obligations, and I figured it was a good time to think (and write!) really critically about my body, and my relationship to it. I have a great relationship to my thinky-brain, but my relationship to my feely-brain is significantly more complicated. I wrote a lot, for many months — and then, since the spring of 2023, I have written a grand total of one article.
A lot of this has to do with the fact that, in no small part because of MORBID, I have landed an absolute dream of a ghostwriting contract. The work there is intensive, and fruitful, and takes up a lot of my time. Combined with a looming deadline for a novel, Theatre of Cruelty (my other substack), and a few contracts I’ve picked up along the way, I have repeatedly found myself at the limit of my capacity to write while also fulfilling what was, ultimately, the mandate for this publication: which was always to develop a relationship to my body which cast it in less of an adversarial role.
I’ve spent the whole winter heavily flip-flopping on what I wanted. Announce a hiatus, come back to writing, announce a hiatus — on and on, ad nauseum. I have plenty of things I want to write about on this subject. What I lack is time, and physical capacity.
So, for now, I am going to officially put this down, in the interest of doing less and accomplishing more — or maybe thinking about doing less, and accomplishing more. I don’t feel done with this idea, or this story, and I plan on coming back while I build up my routine as a full-time, self-employed writer — a world that’s still relatively new to me.
You can find me at Theatre of Cruelty, and on Instagram, and in my Writers’ Trust-finalist memoir, Nothing Will Be Different.